renaissance poisson

tachycardia attack. 11 weeks since the last one, which is a slight improvement over the previous ones in 2013. but it's lasting and lasting (14 hours and going). *sigh*. and i was so looking forward to maybe finishing my weight bench today.

this is how far i got yesterday; the basic structure is built:

bench
1x5 @ 45lb
1x5 @ 55lb
5x5 @ 65lb

pendlay rows
1x5 @ 55lb
1x5 @ 65lb
1x5 @ 75lb
1x5 @ 85lb
5x5 @ 90lb

goblet squats
5x5 @ 23.5lb


finally done with the stomach bug.

5 min cardio.
10 min dynamic stretching.

am timing my rest periods now. not super strict, but i was kinda lackadaisical about it before, and now i am not.

bench: on the floor one last time. still did not take this lift apart. somewhat more stable, though my upper back was not entirely happy. i am now recognizing how different the floor press actually is, though. that's ok, if i can lift it on the floor, i can lift more on bench. theoretically. not a problem with pressing the weight up from the chest, but the lift-off is difficult now. glad the power rack is on its way; that will make benching safer just in time. speaking of why "safer" will be an excellent thing: on set 4 bacchus (big, fat ginger tomcat) decided to rub his butt on my face in mid lift. i have never hissed at him that loud before; it was kind of a spit-hiss -- and that sure cleared him outta there like a cat outta hell. *sigh*. i kept control of the weight though.

rows: did not rest between warmup sets, just changed plates. tried to practice the external shoulder rotation thing, and when i set up i think i have it, but it gets lost thereafter. my form was good at first, and then started to break down (though my wrists did not curl, i moved my back up a bit). i think it would be better if i didn't go for "explosive" at this point, but for "clean" first.

K* ATG squat: 4 min

goblet squats: did not up the weight so i could concentrate on form. but my body was flagging at this point, so all that concentration didn't do a whole lot of good. wasn't bad form, just kinda... not very enthusiastic, draggy.

very tired now; probably after effects from being sick, and both main lifts were taxing me. no accessory lifting for now. maybe later if i stay awake.

my power rack is in richmond; just has to come across to the island by ferry. tomorrow, i think.

bench
1x5 @ 45lb
5x5 @ 60lb

pendlay rows
1x5 @ 65lb
5x5 @ 85lb

goblet squats
1x5 @ 18.5lb


*urk*. still digestive tract problems. getting better though, so under the motto of "no excuses", forward into the breach.

no cardio. the "shwinginess" of the recumbent bike upset my stomach.
10 min light mobility, and K* ATG squat for 3 min.

bench: or not bench. i didn't really have the energy to work out in detail what all is wrong with my benching, so i headed back to the floor. that went a lot better, much less wobble, straighter bar path, and solid lockout. ergo my problems lie with my stability on the bench, not with the lifting itself, as expected.

rows. no problem, but the weight is getting there, and form is a bit harder to hold. good back, good wrists, good grip. i think my wrists are getting stronger. they're very thin in general, and i've been thinking of doing wrist rollers to strengthen them for the weights to come.

goblet squats. weak. weak, weak, weak. had to call it quits after one set because the runs started again. supposing i feel better tomorrow i'll do them then together with core.

no accessory exercises either. just too wiped for it all.

an hour later, when i put away the weights from the rows, i did a squat walkout with 65 lb, and one full squat down, to parallel. not logging that (single squats don't count at this point). but a new PR by 20 lb, *heh*. made me feel good about the workout.

spent a lot of time on the SLIC site today, shorting my work some. 300+ new members! went through a lot of logs, welcoming new people. remembered how it felt when i was new, and only one person talked to me; wanted to make sure at least one person talked to each newb and said something meaningful. now i think i've used up my social for a few months.

overhead press
1x5 @ 45lb
5x5 @ 55lb

deadlift
1x5 @ 85lb
4x5 @ 90lb

goblet squats
5x5 13.5lb

bench dips
5x5 BW


an hour before the workout i felt good. then i did my warmup, and for some reason my whole body felt weak afterwards. i didn't do anything weird or new, and i was looking forward to working out. no idea what happened.

5 min cardio.
15 min mobility.

OHP: the warmup set was ok, but the first set with working weight was not good. i wasn't really tight and had arms like wet noodles. i got the weight up there, but it wasn't pretty; hyperextended back, uneven arms. but i wasn't gonna let my mind screw me over (though still no idea why it would even try). pulled myself together for sets 3-6, tried to crush that bar, and puuuush the weight up. it did go better, though form was still not as good as i wanted it. 5 lb weight increase might be a bit much now, but since i was noodly even with the empty bar, i am not taking that as a reason to start microloading. not yet.

deadlift: did the first set with the usual increase of 5 lb. then increased by another 5 because the first set felt good, and my squat seems like it is never gonna catch up anyway. i just got pissed off that some dark corner of my mind tries to screw with my progress. not gonna let it happen easily. so why not push the deadlift ahead, at least for today, to make myself feel better. my fingers tingled a bit at the end of each set; i'm hoping that's because i am crushing the heck out of the bar. i can really feel my glutes and hamstrings activate now.

goblet squats: i am concentrating hard on form to avoid buttwinking in the hole. my breathing was all over the place at first, but then i regulated it to be very rhythmic, in tune with going down and coming back up.

bench dips: well, my triceps sure felt it tonight. i was gonna add another accessory triceps exercise, but yeah, not necessary. when the new power rack comes, i'll be able to do assisted dips with hands by my side instead of behind me, which better simulates the kayak exit i am working towards.

next time i'll wear my heart rate monitor if i can find the strap. i can really feel the cardio effects of the lifting now. be interesting to see where the heart rate gets to.

mostly good workout, despite the weird start.

bench
1x5 @ 45lb
5x5 @ 55lb

pendlay row
5x5 @ 80lb

goblet squats
5x5 @ 8.5lb

squat
1x1 @ 45lb

DB row
5x10 @ 33.5lb


5 min light cardio.
10 min general mobility.
5 min shoulder mobility.

bench. my form sucks giant boulders through a very tiny straw. i don't know that there is anything good about it at all. well, no, my grip and wrists are fine. but i wobble around on the bench. tried pavel's aggro trick, and while that solidified my shoulders and arms, my body still just kinda blubbered over the edges, and i felt my back was hyperextended. i need to take this lift apart in detail. had no trouble with the weight, at least.

rows. those went well. solid, good form. i am starting to feel the weight, but it is no problem yet. wrist curl problem is under control, though i can feel they want to do it... want to ... want to... but no. not permitted.

ATG squat 3:50 min.

goblet squats, with dumbbell. oh yeah. these are good for me, and my shoulders are happy to get some rest. i have pretty good form, i think, and i got out of the hole every time without twisting. they are amazing for my hip flexors. did one full squat with the oly bar at the end, just to keep it fresh in my mind, since it remains the goal.

single-arm dumbbell rows. i have run out of weights for this, *heh* (whoever expected that would happen). i'll need to buy or build myself a handle for the olympic weights. i like adding dumbbell exercises because with barbells my dominant side might pull more, while with dumbbells there are no excuses for the weaker side.

except for the bad bench form, this felt like a very good workout. i was fed just right too; protein smoothie sufficiently ahead of time to not slosh around in my stomach.

overhead press
1x5 @ 45lb
5x5 @ 50lb

deadlift
5x5 @ 80lb

squat
3x5 @ 45lb
2x5 BW

bench dips
5x5 BW

plank
3x45sec BW


feeling weak and exhausted. didn't sleep well the last 3 nights; nightmares, waking up repeatedly in a cold sweat. guess that would explain it right there, except i can't think of a cause for the crappy dreams. *sigh*. i HATE being weak.

anyway. workout.
5 min light cardio.
10 min general mobility.
5 min shoulder mobility.

OHP started with the empty bar which felt heavy and wobbly. added 5 lb for the 2nd set and that felt so heavy i fought for the last rep, and my form was shite. sat down to rest and mope. then i remembered something i read last week by pavel tsatsouline, about "irradiation", which is meant to commandeer all muscles even remotely connected to get involved in the lift:
• squeeze the weight as if you are trying to crush it to pulp
• squeeze your glutes as if pinching a coin with them
• tighten your abs as if bracing for a punch
this wasn't entirely new information, but pavel gives it that extra aggressive russian comrade *ooomph*. so i went all aggro at the bar and put the advice into action for the 3rd set. and lo and behold, while the weight didn't get "whimsically light" as pavel claims, it went up straight and with good form, without wobbling at all, and no fighting to get the last rep in. same for sets 4 - 6. wow. ok. when i thought my core was tight before, it wasn't actually TIGHT.

deadlift is still easy. i've now realized that there is no reason to keep it to 1 set, not while the weight is easy for me. so i'm gonna do more sets while i can. i am also keeping both up and down movements slow and concentrated; more time under tension is good. i could feel this in my hamstrings and glutes today, yay.

did ATG squat of 4 min before squats, and some extra shoulder mobility, but my shoulders hurt badly. could not keep very tight, did not go parallel. could not pull myself together. i am considering moving the squats to their own day; they're depressing my workout no matter where i put them, so isolating them might be psychologically better. did get through 3 sets with the bar, but then my shoulders were screaming again. honestly, i feel i do a better job and build more strength without the bar at this point. i might do goblet squats instead.

bench dips. i am moving maybe 5 cm, and my triceps burn. yeah, this is what i need to do more of. interestingly enough this does not tax my shoulders horribly. i need to look more closely at my anatomy book to tease apart just exactly what about the arm position in the squat hurts so much.

planks. increased duration to 45 sec each.

except for the squats, this was a good workout.

squats
5x5 BW
1x1 @ 45lb

overhead press
5x5 @ 47lb

deadlift
2x5 @ 75lb

lat pulldowns
3x10 @ 50 lb

~16 hours tachycardia attack yesterday; that's not a personal record i was aiming for. was just about ready to head for the emergency room when it finally converted by itself. exhausted today. it's depressing to think that no matter how much i work to improve myself, the stuff that's debilitating me the worst is just not going away. thought of shifting workout to tomorrow, but the heart is a muscle and making it stronger is a good thing. and i've never yet had an attack from working out.

5 min light cardio.
10 min mobility, more on shoulders than anything else.

started with OHP but increased only by 2 lbs, which is probably sensible anyway. watched the 70sbig video (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sqKhLR1zRaU) again beforehand to remind myself of elbows to ribs, middle knuckles to ceiling, and paid special attention to keeping my core tight in order to avoid hyperextending my back (i know right away whenever my core collapses because my back instantly twitches).

squats with broomstick. trying for hybrid squat form, but didn't have enough energy to set up video, so no idea whether the form was good. since hybrids don't go into the hole, i didn't have the huge problems coming up. but my heart wasn't in it (ha ha).

pulled myself together, and did a full setup, de-rack, and walkout with the oly bar at the end, per what james from SLIC suggested (only more weight), because i felt i was letting myself be too cowed by giving in to being tired and depressed. and i wanted to see whether i was just blowing smoke when i say it's not fear of the weight holding me back, but the shoulders. since my shoulders were all nice and warm from the OHP, they didn't actually try to kill me, and i managed it alright (painful, but bearable). did one squat as a flourish, because i was already standing there, you know? so, yeah. it's not the weight scaring me. i LIKE the weight (that's easy to say now, *heh*). but i do. it feels like i am really doing something when there is weight on my back. it feels good.

deadlift felt fine after that, i threw in an extra set, and i ended the workout feeling emotionally much better than before, despite being even more tired. bed early tonight.

[edit: bed early but not quite yet. i felt so good that i needed to do something else, *heh*. so i added some lat pulldowns on top; they make me more conscious of where my lats actually are than anything else.]

squat
5x5 @ 10lb

overhead press
5x5 @ 45lb

deadlift
3x5 @ 70lb

plank
3x30 sec BW

5 min light cardio.
12 min general mobility.
3 min kstar (kelly starrett, my mobility guru) ATG (ass-to-grass) squat test (slowly creeping up; goal is 10 comfortable minutes). i can keep my feet flat on the floor now without collapsing my arches, but my balance is incredibly precarious.

OHP was good. i did it first so i wouldn't be as affected by the shoulder issues from the squat. i didn't have good form in the first set, which showed itself by a little twitch in my back (i am guessing i hyperextended), so i tightened my core more and that did the trick. oly bar! finally! this is where most people on stronglifts 5x5 start out, *snicker*. i'll either need to microload very soon, and/or do accessory lifts; i think the progression of this program is too steep for weak ole me.

the kayak weighs 44 lbs, so now i could theoretically press it above my head for 5 reps; if i could get a solid grip to heave it up there. ;) i like that!

squats are killing me. both my shoulders and my hip flexors hurt, and i don't just mean "ache". i am glad i have an extra rest day. i am leaning too far forward for a high-bar squat, but i don't have the mobility in my shoulders yet for a low-bar squat. let's not even talk about going lower than parallel, which i should also do while using high-bar. i am still too impatient, i think, and am pushing my mobility issues too fast.

deadlift was also good. so good that i forgot this is the one lift where we don't do 5x5 but only 1x5, and did 3 sets before realizing it. well, it can't hurt since i wasn't struggling, and maintained what i think is decent form -- which is getting much more stable now that i am lifting a higher weight. i still haven't cut standard-sized plates which means the bar rests on a box at the start, which is slightly high. need to get to that.

added planks for abdominals. i am no longer as horribly shaky on these, so i think next time i can up the duration. i should also do side planks.

checked my nutrition log report for the last month. i am not eating enough protein, am a little low on potassium (but no cramps or major palpitations, so not an issue), also a bit short on calcium (been eating less cheese, that's why). otherwise everything seems ok. the protein is the biggest issue; getting most of my protein from plant sources is much more difficult, but i need to bring that up if i am lifting heavier and heavier weights. i am eating in a steady caloric deficit, which isn't what i am aiming for, but i just generally don't seem to be all that hungry, not even in workout days -- that's a big difference from when i last did exercise (aerobic), when i was always ravenous afterwards. i am feeling pretty good though; ticker has been behaving very well for 6 weeks now.

so now i am gonna have salmon sashimi for dinner. ;)

squat
2x5 @ 10 lb
3x5 BW

overhead press
5x5 @ 38.5 lb
1x2 @ 45 lb

deadlift
1x5 @ 65 lb

did you know that there are 3 kinds of people in the world; those who can count and those who can't? ;)

i am clearly among the latter. was supposed to press with 28.5 lb but loaded the wrong plates and therefore pressed with 38.5. i did think it felt heavy and was a little down after the 4th set -- not that i was struggling, but my memory didn't think it should feel that heavy (it was right, of course). but then i checked the plates and facepalmed. also felt extra good after that, *grin*. it was heavy but i actually had no trouble lifting that weight. so at the end of it i had to try to lift the empty oly bar. and then do it again just to show myself. :D i can clearly see how much stronger i have already gotten, because when i bought the weights, that oly bar was HEAVY and i couldn't lift it above my head. it's still heavy, but i can lift it now!

no more curl bar for OHP and bench!

that made up for the terrible, bad form squats which i don't even want to talk about. i did 5 min light cardio and my mobility warmup first after feeling kinda blah all afternoon. i grunted at my hip flexors; it just annoyed me how tight they are. then i wrapped two bits of chain around the galvanized pipe to raise the weight for my improvised bar a little. but i don't think it was the weight. i was tired, and just not in the right head space; felt distracted, my mind was drifting, and i could barely get down to parallel. so i did sets 3-5 without weight just to try to get good form, but it did not happen. *grump*.

i pulled myself together for the press, which then went great, and the deadlift was also fine. no problem at all with the weight for the deadlift; lots of room to grow. i am keeping the increases to 5 lb so i have some hope to get the squat in line with it eventually, though some times i wonder whether i don't have a whole lot more power for the deadlift anyway.

i ate badly today too -- not bad food, just forgot about it for too long and then shoveled too much food into my maw because i was so hungry, which then laid in my stomach like a lead weight. i know this is dumb, and yet i let it happen too often.

but i exercised even though i did not feel like it. tomorrow is gloria, and i want to cancel.

warmup:
5 min light cardio on treadmill
5 min mobility

1. wall squats with instability ball
3 x 15 @ 20 lb dumbbells

so i am actually doing more squats with more weight here than i do for my SL5x5 -- BUT i don't go as deep, and it's not the same form, so i don't count them for that. i checked my actual backsquat form in the mirror, and i am not quite deep enough when i do it freestanding without a box to indicate. but i am getting there (45 squats total! man, what a change from where i was just a few weeks ago). but seriously, i feel much better about fewer squats with good form than this sloppy stuff.

i am not a fan of mirrors in general, but i think i will buy some for the wall in the living room so i can check my form better.

2. step-ups with dumbbells
3 x 14 @ 20 lb

3. lying glute bridge with extended leg
1 x 14
2 x 14 @ 10 lb sandbell on lower abdomen

4. calf raises against instability ball with dumbbells
3 x 15 @ 20 lb

5. bozo ball balancing
3 x 30 sec

6: hip adductor and abductor kicks with sandbell
3 x 12 @ 10 lb

7. two-arm kettlebell swings
1 x 8 @ 8 lb
1 x 10 @ 5 lb
1 x 5 @ 8 lb
1 x 5 @ 5 lb

8. stretches

had me sweaty but not overworked. gloria added more rest time because this was more intensive cardio-wise than before. so she did take that comment into account, except that she didn't reduce the cardio component, which i had wanted, she just added more rest. which coincidentally means there is one less exercise. it's like she tries on purpose to give me pro-forma what i asked for without actually giving it to me. man, that does feel like a power play. so stupid. what does she actually think she is gaining here? ah, maybe i am just pissed off now about the lousy communication after i tried so hard to be fair, and overreact to what seems like an extended pout session on her part. who knows. who cares. i don't have the spoons to worry about the emotional state of my PT.

so she's indeed mostly splitting into upper and lower body (though the kettlebell swing isn't really a lower body exercise), and at least there were squats. she's not giving us any advice for what we should do outside of her workouts, nor does she ask what else we do (though she must know i do something else because my strength has increased even though we didn't work out for more than 2 weeks). she's also not correcting much -- i was clearly hyperextended in my back during the calf raises, and she didn't say a thing until i remarked on it. ah well.

it continued to work very well to have us both do the same exercises (the weird kettlebell weights are because they have only one bell for each weight?). as usual she didn't give any reasons for the weights or the reps; we're just supposed to do them. ok; i am basically just biding my time now; at least this time there was no failure on anything, and i felt reasonably good afterwards. i'm definitely gonna miss working out with the paramour though, that part is fun.

rewarded ourselves by having japanese food (chirashi don, yum) after running errands -- bought some chain (stop drooling, *poing*) in 1-lb sections so i can increase my load on the bar more gradually than in 5-lb increments. also got a piece of plumbing pipe as an intermediate bar once i graduate from the broomstick.